Film and TV

Quotations from Motion Pictures and TV Shows.

65 quotations — 12 Funny, 3 Serious, 50 Trivia.

Here's page 2 of 4.

  1. Daddy's home!
    Barney Stinson 21.
  2. Freeze frame high-five!
    Barney Stinson 22.
  3. Hello, Ted.
    If you're watching this tape — and I knew you'd pick this one — you are now in possession of my porn.
    This can only mean two things: either I'm dead, or I'm now in a committed relationship.
    If I'm dead, I want you to honor my memory by taking my body to the Hamptons, and recreating “Weekend at Bernie's”: I wanna‘ dance, I wanna’ have sex with a girl, and I wanna' go fishing.
    If, on the other hand, I'm in a committed relationship, then, as your best friend, I have only one request: please, for the love of God, GET ME OUT OF THIS!
    Barney Stinson 23.
  4. Hi. Haaaave you met Ted?
    Barney Stinson 24.
  5. Hypothetical high-five!
    Barney Stinson 25.
  6. Jesus waited three days to come back to life. It was perfect!
    If he had only waited one day, a lot of people wouldn't have even heard he died.
    They'd be all “Hey Jesus, what up?”; and Jesus would probably be like “What up? I died yesterday!”; and they'd be all “Uh ... you look pretty alive to me, dude.”.
    And then Jesus would have to explain how he was resurrected, and how it was a miracle, and the dude'd be like “Uhh ... okay; whatever you say, bro.”.
    And he's not gonna come back on a Saturday. Everybody's busy: doing chores, workin‘ the loom, trimmin’ the beard.
    No! He waited the perfect number of days: three.
    Plus, it's Sunday; so everyone's in church already.
    And they're all in there like “Oh no; Jesus is dead”.
    And then BAM! He bursts in the back door, runnin' up the aisle, everyone's totally psyched — and FYI, that's when he invented the high five.
    That's why we wait three days to call a woman: because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait.
    Barney Stinson 26.
  7. Phone-five!
    [On the phone.]
    Barney Stinson 27.
  8. Self-five!
    [To himself.]
    Barney Stinson 28.
  9. Tiny-five!
    [To a little kid.]
    Barney Stinson 29.
  10. What up?
    Barney Stinson 30.
  11. Elementary, my dear Watson.
    [As Sherlock Holmes, in “The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes”.]
    Basil Rathbone 31.
  12. Fasten your seatbelts. It's going to be a bumpy night.
    [As Margo Channing, in “All About Eve”.]
    Bette Davis 32.
  13. Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
    [As Rhett Butler, in “Gone with the Wind”.]
    Clark Gable 33.
  14. Go ahead; make my day.
    [As Harry Callahan, in “Sudden Impact”.]
    Clint Eastwood 34.
  15. You've got to ask yourself one question: “Do I feel lucky?”.
    Well, do ya, punk?
    [As Harry Callahan, in “Dirty Harry”.]
    Clint Eastwood 35.
  16. Here's looking at you, kid.
    [As Rick Blaine, in “Casablanca”.]
    Humphrey Bogart 36.
  17. Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
    [As Rick Blaine, in “Casablanca”.]
    Humphrey Bogart 37.
  18. Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.
    [As Rick Blaine, in “Casablanca”.]
    Humphrey Bogart 38.
  19. The stuff that dreams are made of.
    [As Sam Spade, in “The Maltese Falcon”.]
    Humphrey Bogart 39.
  20. We'll always have Paris.
    [As Rick Blaine, in “Casablanca”.]
    Humphrey Bogart 40.

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