68 quotations — 47 Funny, 20 Serious, 1 Trivia.
Here's page 1 of 4.
It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa.Alan Perlis 1.
Unix is user friendly.Andreas Bogk 2.
It's just picky about it's friends.
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things.Andy Rooney 3.
But most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
The first ninety percent of a task takes ninety percent of the time.Arthur Bloch 4.
The last ten percent, takes the other ninety percent of the time.
C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot.Bjarne Stroustrup 5.
C++ makes it harder, but, when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.Damian Conway 6.
Documentation is like sex:Dick Brandon 7.
when it's good, it's very, very good;
when it's bad, it's better than nothing.
Premature optimization is the root of all evil — or, at least, most of it — in programming.Donald Knuth 8.
How does a large software project get to be one year late?Fred Brooks 9.
One day at a time!
The wonderful thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from.Grace Hopper 10.
The most amazing achievement of the computer software industry is its continuing cancellation of the steady and staggering gains made by the computer hardware industry.Henry Petroski 11.
Do you validate other people's markup?Jeff Croft 12.
Yes? You're an asshole.
[Referring to HTML markup; and to validating that markup to W3C specs.]
A distributed system is one in which the failure of a computer you didn't even know existed can render your own computer unusable.Leslie Lamport 13.
Computers are useless.Pablo Picasso 14.
They can only give you answers.
Any sufficiently advanced bug is indistinguishable from a feature.Rich Kulawiec 15.
Programming languages, like pizzas, come in only two sizes: too big and too small.Richard E. Pattis 16.
Programming, today, is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to build bigger and better idiots.Rick Cook 17.
So far, the universe is winning.
Always listen to experts.Robert A. Heinlein 18.
They'll tell you what can't be done, and why.
Then, go do it.
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.Robert X. Cringely 19.
Software and cathedrals are much the same.Sam Redwine 20.
First we build them, then we pray.