68 quotations — 47 Funny, 20 Serious, 1 Trivia.
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There are 10 types of people: those who understand binary and those who don't.Unsourced 41.
To be, or not to be.Unsourced 42.
Those are the parameters.
User Error.Unsourced 43.
Replace user, and press any key to continue.
Virus check complete.Unsourced 44.
All viruses functioning normally.
Welcome to Hell.Unsourced 45.
Here's your copy of Windows ME.
Why doesn't DOS ever say “Excellent command or file name”?Unsourced 46.
XML is like violence: if it doesn't solve your problem, you aren't using enough of it.Unsourced 47.
Actually, I made up the term “object-oriented”.Alan Kay 48.
And I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
People who are really serious about software should make their own hardware.Alan Kay 49.
Simple things should be simple; complex things should be possible.Alan Kay 50.
[Referring to software for document editing.]
Adapting old programs to fit new machines usually means adapting new machines to behave like old ones.Alan Perlis 51.
Around computers, it is difficult to find the correct unit of time to measure progress.Alan Perlis 52.
Some cathedrals took a century to complete. Can you imagine the grandeur and scope of a program that would take as long?
Simplicity does not precede complexity, but follows it.Alan Perlis 53.
Everyone knows that debugging is twice as hard as writing the program in the first place.Brian Kernighan 54.
So, if you're as clever as you can be when you write it, how will you ever debug it?
First make it run.Brian Kernighan 55.
Then, make it run fast.
[Referring to computer programs.]
The most effective debugging tool is still careful thought — coupled with judiciously placed print statements.Brian Kernighan 56.
There are two ways of constructing a software design.C.A.R. Hoare 57.
One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies.
And the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies.
Treat your password like your toothbrush: don't let anybody else use it, and get a new one every six months.Clifford Stoll 58.
Why is it drug addicts and computer aficionados are both called users?Clifford Stoll 59.
Computer science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.Edsger Dijkstra 60.