George Bernard Shaw

A playwright.

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23 quotations — 15 Funny, 8 Serious.

  1. A woman who demands equality is selling herself short.
    1.
  2. Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.
    2.
  3. He who can, does.
    He who can't, teaches.
    3.
  4. I dislike feeling at home, when I am abroad.
    4.
  5. I enjoy convalescence.
    It is the part that makes the illness worth while.
    5.
  6. I find fault with only three things in this story of yours: the beginning, the middle, and the end.
    6.
  7. My specialty is being right when other people are wrong.
    7.
  8. Shaw: Madam, would you sleep with me for a million pounds?
    Actress: My goodness. Well, I'd certainly think about it.
    Shaw: Would you sleep with me for a pound?
    Actress: Certainly not! What kind of woman do you think I am?!
    Shaw: Madam, we've already established that. Now we are haggling about the price.
    8.
  9. She had lost the art of conversation.
    But not, unfortunately, the power of speech.
    9.
  10. Take care to get what you like, or you'll be forced to like what you get.
    10.
  11. The secret of success is to offend the greatest number of people.
    11.
  12. The single biggest problem, in communication, is the illusion that it has taken place.
    12.
  13. We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.
    13.
  14. Which painting in the National Gallery would I save, if there was a fire?
    The one nearest the door, of course.
    14.
  15. Why was I born with such contemporaries?
    15.
  17. A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
    16.
  18. Life contains but two tragedies.
    One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it.
    17.
  19. Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
    18.
  20. Silence is the perfect expression of scorn.
    19.
  21. The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism, by those who have not got it.
    20.
  22. There is no love sincerer than the love of food.
    21.
  23. You see things that are, and ask “Why?”.
    I dream of things that never were, and ask “Why not?”.
    22.
  24. Youth is wasted on the young.
    23.